The Fellowship visit Rivendell again
by Vladivos
Summary: Expect randomness (read the reviews if you want confirmation of this)
1. Of the Fellowship visiting Elrond

**Disclaimer: As you most likely guessed I own none of these characters, they are completely JRR Tolkien's creations etc etc this story if not based on actual events in any of his books. That enough? P.s, to anyone who does not know, rafflesia is a very very large flower that smells of rotten meat. Enjoy………..(!)**

**Aragorn hurtled through the forest, fervently wishing that he had never set eyes on Legolas's new horse as he was scraped off the back AGAIN by it dashing underneath a tree with 'convenient' low branches for the younger Elves to practise climbing. Drunkenly getting up he was bowled over as the horse came back to retrieve him, tripped over a stone (put there of course for the convenience of the younger Elves to help them get up into the tree) and fell head first into a large hole which he could have sworn was NOT there a few seconds ago.**

** "Hey Aragorn? That you?" came a voice.**

**"Yes it's, I mean _no _of course not, what ever gave you that idea….er hem…." he replied, putting on an extra high squeaky voice and trying to hide his crown in the top of his boot.**

**"Oh. I was hoping that someone else who's supposedly 'respected' would fall in so I wouldn't look so stupid when they come to pull me out of here."**

**"_Elrond?!_" Aragorn sniggered, then tried to pretend he was coughing, then sniggered again, then collapsed on the floor laughing.**

**"You do realise what you're lying on don't you?" replied Elrond miserably. Aragorn leapt up dancing a funny little jig and making interesting wolf-like howling noises. "I HATE ANTS!!" he yelled, still not realising that the best way to get them off was not to continue dancing around on the anthill. Oh well…..**

**            Just then the sound of laughter was heard, and a gang of younger Elves came to inspect the pit, which was made of course for their convenience to learn how to capture wild animals. "Quick!" hissed Elrond, pulling him into a little alcove so they couldn't be seen, "we can't let them find us!"**

**"Hide and seek! Yay!" shouted Aragorn loudly, standing up before he realised that the alcove was only 3 feet tall and had a rock ceiling. The little Elves peered down in amazement as the King tried to hide himself again. "I love this game!" Resisting the impulse to call Aragorn a juvenile *cough cough* , Elrond strode out into the main area of the pit and announced in a loud commanding voice:**

**"I'm afraid our friend here is not quite himself and…."**

**"I told you to lay off the penicillin," giggled Aragorn, emerging also and promptly sitting down on the anthill to recover.**

**"I came down here to rescue him and I appear to have left my rope at Mirkwood. As that is at least 2000 miles away from here I would be extremely grateful of some assistance, as although I am perfectly capable of climbing out of here myself I do not want to have to leave our poor suffering friend alone here."**

**"Well that's what happens when you feed me mushrooms. I told you that penicillin was a load of rubbish" muttered Aragorn as he finally realised his crown wouldn't fit any more because of the bump on his head and that his ham sandwiches had been eaten by the ants.**

**            The young Elves however seemed awestruck by Elrond's powerful speech making techniques. They could have just as easily been staring at him wondering how on Middle Earth he managed to get his long hair standing completely up in spikes, but Elrond had many other modern experiments as well as 'penicillin' so it wasn't really that much of a rare sight. 'Electricity' was rumoured to be going very well, until Elrond realised that calling down the lightning might be a little _too_ powerful. Well, everyone was sure that the ancient, priceless architecture would be rebuilt eventually.**

**            Anyway, they immediately set about finding some rope,  eventually finding it binding Boromir to a pillar at the top of Caradhras about 5 years later, so for that time they had to make do with some vines. By the time Aragorn and Elrond were both out (some things take longer than first anticipated when people neglect to realise that one Elf-child can't hold the weight of two grown men. Then the next would-be rescuer neglects to realise that they can't hold the weight of two full grown men and his friend, and the third neglects to realise that he can't hold the weight of two full grown men and two of his friends….) it was nearly dark. And at that moment Legolas arrived with a whole reel of rope after searching for the Fellowship throughout the woods for the whole day. It seemed that Aragorn wasn't the only one who wasn't exactly suited to Legolas's new horses…..**

**            Anyhow, eventually they arrived back at (what was left of…) Rivendell, and once the young Elves had gone to bed (in rooms directly above the feast hall, provided for their convenience so they could learn to appreciate late-night adult conversation. Most often 'maybe I should have had the fruit juice after all….' but educational nevertheless) Elrond made another stirring speech on how he had rescued Aragorn from a terrible chasm…….._all by himself_. " My Daddy's not afraid of anything!" piped up Arwen enthusiastically. She was, it must be noted looking for an allowance increase at the time. Looking slyly at Elrond's proud expression and the assortment of stuffed fruit at the buffet (Gimli and Sam had been having a 'let's see how quickly we can eat everything nice' competition) Frodo decided that state banquets were altogether too boring, and had a sneaky chat about Elrond's habits with his two sons in the corner……. "Elrond…?" he asked innocently, putting on his best suffering little hero expression "why's there a huge spider in your hair?" No-one noticed him sniggering. An obviously terrified Elrond looking as though he was trying to drown himself in the wine vat was much more interesting. When he eventually emerged, with his hair now an extremely diverting purple but at least spider-less (as it had been for the whole evening I might hasten to add…) Frodo piped up again. "Aren't you supposed to be a teetotal Elrond?" Looking at the Elf Lord's expression Frodo decided that he had some very pressing engagements to attend too. Well, he did now anyway.**

**            Meanwhile Merry and Pippin were still trying to find their rooms. After finally working out that there really _shouldn't_ be a dead Balrog in the sleeping quarters, they eventually came to the conclusion that this was not the sleeping quarters. "Merry?" said Pippin.**

**"Yes Pippin?" said Merry.**

**"What rhymes with Gimli?"**

**"Why?"**

**"I'm trying to write a limerick. 'There once was a Dwarf, name of Gimli, who….?"**

**"Never spread his butter too thinly?"**

**"Mli and Nly don't rhyme, stupid" retorted Pippin, not realising the importance of similar sounding letters and vowels that aren't really vowels but are anyway.**

**"Why don't you made it 'Gimli was a fat ugly Dwarf…'?"**

**"Okay then," replied Pip, his face going once more into a state of utmost concentration. Such a pity that lamp stands have to appear in the most inconvenient places when people have other things on their minds.**

**"Don't worry, Pip," said Merry cheerfully, "I'm sure the scar's not permanent y'know." Pippin sniffed and muttered something about reedbeds and evil booming birds. Pip wasn't used to concentrating so hard and the repetitive strain injury on his brain was becoming even worse after the bump on his head. However, the pair continued walking, determined to find either the sleeping quarters, the food, or Gimli and Sam, which were essentially all the same thing. A few moments later Pip seemed his normal self and was back asking questions again.**

**"Merry?" said Pip,**

**"Yes Pip?" said Merry.**

**"What rhymes with Dwarf?"**

**And as this story is intended for some of a younger audience we must here leave what happened to Pippin, though I can tell you it involved a water demon, a roast chicken and a book of Latin swear words. And I can also tell you that it resulted in both Merry and Pip ending up in the sanatorium (or what was left of the sanatorium after Elrond's 'dangerous abrasive moulds' experiment.) **

**            It so happened that Gimli was now in a dungeon, after being arrested for giving the younger Elves (at their convenience of course) a very graphic demonstration with Sam about war, involving a 'volunteer' orc and a meat cleaver. Being that he had already devoured the entire banquet except the stuffed fruit (and only leaving that because he was allergic to GM oranges. They had the same effect on him as penicillin had on Aragorn – and various other of Elrond's creations had on everyone else. This was the 'dangerously hyperactive effect' or DHE as it had come to be known, and it was a very serious condition indeed (*there _is_ a joke there but I don't expect anyone to get it so please ignore that sentence and don't worry if you don't. I have a weeeird sense of humour….*)  **

**             Anyway, due to this fact it was generally believed that Gimli was lying when he said it was only to carve the lamb, as he'd finished all the lamb at least 4 hours ago. He was sentenced to stay in the dungeon for one night three hours and seven minutes and was forbidden from touching any meat cleavers during that time. Sam, however was exempted from this punishment on the 'medical grounds' that dungeon air was bad for his lungs. (Possibly it had the DHE on him after Elrond invented 'dry rafflesia petals hanging in a basket' air freshener, but it was more likely that he had simply been trying to eat the same amount as Gimli in their little competition.) _He_ was taken to the sanatorium where he had a very lively game of charades with Merry and Pippin, though unfortunately got slightly stumped when asked to act out 'The day the orc stole my motorbike' as no-one except Elrond (and even then only very rarely) had any idea which of Elrond's inventions was which.**

** This had led to many other problems over the ages, especially between the words 'Catherine wheel' and 'orange peel'. The tinder-box industry had had a huge boom after people wore out all their firelighting equipment trying to light the oranges (genetically modified with extra-waxy skins for preventing fires, as a convenience to the younger Elves of course,) and the new 'firework' industry became non-existent when people tried using Catherine wheels to decorate their party cakes and then lit the candles…..**

            And as for Gandalf, he was down in another part of the dungeons having a lively and animated conversation with the imprisoned Saruman.

**"Hello there old boy! I'm Gandalf the White now, isn't that just jolly spiffing!"**

**"Oh ja old boy! Ripping! I'd had that White title for too bally long wotwot?"**

**"Absoluuutely old chap. Chocks away and time for a new start at the old Sallying eh wot?"**

**"Tremeeeendous lark that."**

**"Ja! Suuuper!"**

**And so it went on.**

**And as for Boromir tied to a pillar on top of Caradhras? Well I'm sure he enjoyed his winter…..erm…..holiday….**


	2. Of the dangers of eating mushrooms

Disclaimer: as I said in the previous chapter none of the characters are mine etc……..and that's all this really has to say, non?

Chapter 2: Of the dangers of eating mushrooms .

            Meanwhile, while the rest of the Fellowship (and various elves, dwarfs, hobbits, men and a dead Balrog) were sound and……_relatively _safe in Rivendell (providing they stayed out of the sanitorium which had never quite recovered from the 'dangerous abrasive mould' experiment) Boromir was having second thoughts about trusting tall black-cloaked strangers who seemed to have constant sniffles. 

After finally reaching the conclusion that perhaps this rather convenient dark passageway didn't lead to Gondor after all, he had sought a way to escape from it, emerging bang in the middle of a large ring of tiny white mushrooms "Hmm.." he muttered, pulling out his sword in what he hoped was a threatening gesture and edging slowly towards the nearest mushroom, "well…..I don't _think_ Elrond's been anywhere near it……. It _might_ be safe to eat………if it doesn't attack me that is…." As you have probably guessed by now, the passage that Boromir had been travelling in had had a rather low roof, but then again after Elrond's abrasive mould no-one could really blame him for being a bit more cautious than is usually required when choosing lunch. Rubbing his head (unfortunately while he was still holding the sword) Boromir sat down in the middle of the circle and proceeded to think up a plan of how to determine whether or not these mushrooms were safe to eat, as by now he was very hungry. Pulling a huge steak garnished with herbs out of his rucksack, he carefully took aim and threw it at the nearest mushroom. The steak fell over the edge of the cliff, and the mushroom remained, as innocently as ever in the ground. "Ha ha!" cried Boromir, leaping up to pick it, "I love a good mushroom dinner almost as much as I love a nice steak!" 

As he proceeded to chomp through the rest of the circle, Boromir slowly realised that it seemed to be getting very warm for the top of Caradhras (whether he knew it was Caradhras or not, it ceratinly wasn't that hard to realise that his beard was frozen to his collar) and he finally took the initiative to look up. Surrounding (what had been….) the mushroom circle were at least 500 little white snow-creatures, staring in awe at the now unconcious man in the middle of their holy temple.

"He entered the temple! And the holy mushrooms have disappeared!"

"I have never seen such a creature before! So huge…..so powerful!"

"I am very old. Many years ago creatures such as this came to the mountain, and when they climbed the very rocks tumbled from the peaks!"

"Rocks?…….Tumbling…rocks…..?" Boromir said sleepily as the creatures edged closer, "that wasn't me, honest! I was just….visiting, with my friends. So much….um…..erm……fresh air up here don't you think? It was…..SARUMAN! Ha! Yes! He's the one you wan't, it wasn't me destroying your lovely…..er…..home," he finished, giggling weakly in what he hoped was a shocked and apologetic, yet 'so happy to be here again darling' way. The little creatures stared in astonishment for a few seconds and then one of them piped up, "he said the name mummy! He said the name of thmmff!" being quickly silenced as Boromir made agonised expressions and finally resorted to throwing chunks of lembas at him. Unfortunately the child seemed to like the lembas very much, and soon he was swamped by at least 300 of the snow-creatures charging into his rucksack in an attempt to extract the rest. Boromir himself was left shivering in a light tunic and socks as the remaining creatures decided that maybe he was hiding more of the marvellous substance somewhere underneath that very large cloak of his….

            "Boy, talk about DHE," snapped Boromir vehemently, as his cape was finally returned, "if you lot EVER do that again I'll……" Just then one of the smaller creatures gave a sob and cowered into its mothers fur. Boromir raised his sword again, then looked again, then raised it again, then looked, then dropped the sword and was on the point of saying "then I'll become……_most_ displeased with you all" when the sword landed on the edge of a large branch and catapulted it up into his face. Well at least it freed his beard.

            It wasn't long before the beings were back to their usual frisky selves, but were silenced (violently) as the old one spoke again. "He spoke the name of Sarra-mon! Our most holy of Gods!"

And that was how Boromir ended up tied to a pillar on top of Caradhras as a 'guardian against 'big wind' and 'squawk squawk birds'  - at least that was what it sounded like anyway. And to top it all off it turned out that although they had indeed never been part of Elrond's 'let's modernise the world!' experiments, the mushrooms were very very poisonous and Boromir was now an interesting shade of purple coldness and green blobs.

And to hear of his heroic rescue you'll have to wait 'til chapter 3. Sorry this isn't so good guys, I got a bit stuck for ideas L. Anyway, allow me to recommend my best friend Canis Vimes (who was so kind to recommend me *grin *). Very good story she has J


	3. Of the coming of age and a corset strap

Disclaimer: I do not own the characters, I do not take any credit for them etc. See chapter 1 for the rest of it.

Chapter 3: Of the coming of age and a corset strap.

            Anyhow, it did eventually come to pass that Boromir was rescued from this terrible plight. Although no-one seemed to care that he'd gone – in fact so far it seemed that no-one had actually noticed – he was chanced upon about 5 years later by Aragorn, who was searching for his lost family heirloom. This precious item was his great great great grandmother's leather corset strap, and a Middle-Earth wide search was being conducted. Aragorn seemed to think this was necessay. Anyway, rather than actually having any desire to free Boromir, Aragorn thought that if he did he could leave Boromir to search the rest of Caradhras and get the hell out of there. 

            Meanwhile, back in Rivendell Elrond had decided that many of the younger elves were now old and mature enough to have responsibilities concerning some of his many experiments. At which declaration they had decided to act as immaturely as possible and go to smash up his room. "After all," they pondered, "if you're going to go to all the bother you might as well pick someone with an expensive taste in interior design."

            Needless to say Elrond was slightly dissappointed with the lack of enthusiasm for his ideas of a bright, modern new world. However, he could hardly fail to understand his comrades' reluctance concerning the 'abrasive mould' that had destroyed the sanatorium a grand total of 17 times (not including the times it had been 'half destroyed' or 'almost destroyed' or 'practically destroyed'), and the 'rafflesia air freshener' which meant the sanatorium was needed more than ever just when it was out of action. (Rafflesia is a flower that smells of rotten meat). Even Elrond's cook was having problems – the 'popping candy' went a bit over the top. There goes what was left of the antique architecture.

            However, there was one other reason why the younger elves thought it at their convenience to smash up what was left of Rivendell. They were looking for a ceratin slingshot which had been confiscated some years ago after a nasty accident involving a large rock, a violent vermillion coloured robe and a field of Spanish bulls. It had happened to have a very fine leather strap, and Aragorn appeared slightly upset when he realised it was no longer in his sparkly purple jewellery box. These younger Elves had been brought up very strictly in the proper etiquette (you say 'give me that juice mother, now!' not 'Hand i' over dere mum, dis sec'nd!' as one example of court manners) and aswell as wanting to help Aragorn in his plight also thought there might be a reward in the bargain. Especially if they 'happened' to find it somewhere dangerous. Or they could get an even bigger reward from one of Aragorn's friends who was getting fed up and would pay any price to get rid of him. Heh heh heh

            Anyway, by now Aragorn was so distraught that he decided drastic measures were in order. He must go and visit Merry and Pippin. Walking slowly and dejectedly up to their door, he gave a 'light tap' (at which point the door fell in, smashing into the light and plunging the hobbit-hole into complete darkness) walked in the door (tripping over the carpet and landing face first in Boromir's basket of leftover mushrooms which he had given the hobbits as a gift) then called out Merry and Pippin's names (waking up a very vicous dog in the next room.) Soon Merry and Pip came to see what all the fuss was about, and sniggered as they tried to untangle Aragorn from the dog and the hat stand with which he was defending himself with (well, attempting to.) Merry sighed. "Well, Mr Strider, it appears that our dog's been annoying you again. Dear old Mauler." Aragorn's glare as blood poured down his leg was completely lost as Merry enquired whether he wanted some more mushrooms. And he even forgot his own anger as he gradually lost it in the euphoria of his mushroom DHE.

"Merry?" said Pip.

"Yes Pip?" said Merry.

"I thought Aragorn was supposed to be a proud and chivalrous warrior." Unfortunately at this moment the DHE wore off and Aragorn, now fully returned to his senses, looked at Pippin in shock. "Why, you….you…..you can TALK! In the language of the Dunedain! And I actually understood you! I didn't know you could talk that language!"

Pip raised his eyebrows disdainfully. "I didn't know that YOU could talk at all actually. Judging by the success of your battle strategies you don't seem to possess any great intellectual capacity."

"Go get 'im Pip!" yelled Merry in encouragement, skipping around the room with a bottle of recently discovered diet lemonade, "and I bet he can't swing off that tree like you do either!"

Aragorn spluttered, and enquired what tree this might be. When Merry showed him the little apple tree in the garden he swaggered over with a manly swagger and began to climb up after Pip. "Now," said Pip, "you simply put your foot here, your right hand here, your left hand here round this rope…….and swing!" Aragorn snorted at the easiness of it all. He put his foot in the foot hole, his right hand where instructed, and his left hand on the rope. He was just about to let go when he happened to glance at the rope he was holding. With a surprised yell he let go, his foot caught in a vine swung him round into the trunk, but unfortunately he was still holding onto the other branch. With a 'snap' it gave way, leaving him to fall in a very convenient hole which was filled with nettles. Lovely.

And as to the familiarity of this hole and the rope (which you have most probably guessed) you'll have to wait for chapter 4. If you can still be bothered reading this after all the forced jokes that is……… 


	4. Of Aragorn and the difficulties of getti...

Of Aragorn and the difficulties of getting revenge.

"What do you think you're doing with my HEIRLOOM?!!!" yelled Aragorn furiously as Merry and Pippin edged slowly away from the tree, which was creaking ominously and had developed a pronounced starboard lean…

"Heirloom? They told us it was a slingshot. I was catching…." Merry looked up into the sky, "I was catching cloud….falcons," he finished.

"_Falcons_??" asked Aragorn incredulously, looking at what seemed to be an undisturbed flock of sparrows flying in full view directly in front of the 'falcon nest.'

"Yes. Falcons. And Eagles," replied Merry stubbornly, folding his arms.

"And clouds," added Pippin. Aragorn narrowed his eyes, trying to look as menacing as one possibly can when one is hanging upside down from a branch off a corset strap. He tried to scratch his stubble in a thoughtful gesture, but as his hands were both strapped to the branch the effect was more like a frilled lizard having a neck-stretching competition.

"A slingshot, eh?" he said at last. "Do you always believe everything you're told?"

"_You_ do," pointed out Pippin.

"But that wasn't what I asked!" cackled the Ranger triumphantly. "I finally got the better of you, hahahaha!" His chest shook up and down with mirth, which vibrated the branch. The branch shook and vibrated the larger branch it was attched too.

"The foot bone's connected to the…….small branch bone, the branch bone's connected to the….large branch bone, the branch bone's connected to the……trunk bone, the trunk bone's connected to the….ground bone" sang Merry and the starboard list became more of a listING motion and then more of an 'on the ground with the roots in the air' position.

"Mmmfff! Mmmfff!" gasped Aragorn.

"It's called 'the shrewd avoidance of the awkward question', get used to it," snapped Pip, hands on hips.

"Mmmff," answered Aragorn dejectedly.

*          *          *

Meanwhile, a few miles away in Rivendell things were a lot more normal. Order had (almost) been restored to the sanatorium as Elrond's 'cold vaccine' – although its only action being to cause the cold victims to contract tonsilitis and glandular fever in addition to their cold – was discovered to be deadly to the dangerous abrasive mould. No-one could actually _work_ in the sanatorium unless they were immune to glandular fever and tonsilitis (in which case they would have mumps which was the side effect of the tonsilitis vaccine) BUT the room itself was a tremendous improvement. Right now there was the usual queue of patients, this time needing a dentist. Elrond hadn't quite worked out the difference between 'dental floss' and 'candy floss.'

Merry and Pippin crept round the back of the wall and hopped over a large stile (conveniently placed to allow freedom of movement for the younger members of the Elven community.)

"Did he get it?" whispered a small Elf named Pointy-Eared Darling (Ped for short). Merry and Pippin looked at each other.

"Well, yeeessssss….." Merry coughed.

"And did he give you a reward for us?" Merry opened his mouth to speak but Pip got in first.

"Well, noooooo."

"Darn," said Ped, with a very un-darling like gesture in what he thought was the direction of Gondor (it was actually Moria but he would have been equally happy to direct it there after Sam and Gimli beat him at the 'ale-swiggin' meat-eatin' arm wrestlin' orc killin' uruk-hai killin' balrog killin' nazgul killin' evil wizard killin' annoying business partners killin' mama's big gardenin' competition.')

                                                              *        *          *

Meanwhile, Aragorn had much more dangerous retribution in mind for the little thieves who'd stolen his heirloom. After replacing it carefully in his grandmother's purple sparkly jewellery box he'd donned his most expensive camouflage cloak (turquoise), a hardy helmet (yellow saucepan) a pair of trusty trail-boots and gone looking for them. He hadn't gone far when he ran into Sam, dejctedly pruning a selection of menacing looking plants. Aragorn's eyes widened.

"You've certainly changed your style!" 

Sam beamed and blushed, fingering the Mickey-Mouse (the 'tullo-vizzin' had exploded but Elrond's 'annie-mayters' were still popular) t-shirt that hung baggily down to his knees and trailed in the dirt.

"I know it's meant to be a kid's pro-grammmm but I'm glad you like it!" he grinned. Aragorn stared at the hobbit blankly. Sam stared back. Aragorn looked at the t-shirt.

"I was talking about your plants."

"Oh," replied Sam. "Gimli insisted. Otherwise he said he wouldn't enter the competition with me," he sniffed.

"What competition?"

"The ale-killin' meat-wrestlin'..err…wizard swiggin'…killin', killin'….um…."

*          *          *

"Perhaps we should get out of here," hissed Frodo to Gollum as they spied from behind a bush. Edging away into a meadow Gollum burst into a screaming rage.

"No preciousssss! You're sssssaying in all wrong!! SSS!!!"

"Sssssaying what, masssssster?" whisssspered Frodo.

"You ssshould have sssssaid 'perhapSSSS we SSShould get out of here' you SSSilly," huffed Gollum, "Lissssten to the ssssusssssurasssssionssssss. I love that word," he cackled evilly.

"Lisssssten to the WHATsssss?"

"Sussurations you idiot! Must I sssstop my ssssssibilantssssss every time I talk to you, preciousssss?!"

*          *          *

Anyhow, having finally managed to get the end of Sam's t-shirt caught in the Venus fly trap and the aptly named 'hmm..I think my latest invention may be slightly acidi….yowww!!!' plant at the same time, Aragorn managed to creep away and continue on his mission, only to be waylaid by Gandalf and Saruman only a few steps later, who were arguing heatedly with Legolas and Arwen.

"We told you Saruman was locked up for a _reason,_" sighed the Elves dejectedly as giant avalnches fell randomly from the sky.

"Well I say!" said Gandalf irritably, "it would've been awfully bad form just to leave him there, wot?" He twitched his moustaches and was on the verge of shaking his head when

"DON'T SHAKE YOUR HEAD!"

"Why ever not? Absoballylutely aaaaawful manners these days, youngsters. Indeed! Wotwotwot!" Whereupon he shook his head, causing the largest avalanche yet to fall from the brim of his hat and get caught in his large, bushy eyebrows.

"Younster indeed," fumed Legolas, "it's my 2500th birthday next week."

"Well I'm older than you," muttered Arwen, darkly.

"Are not."

"Am too."

"Are not."

"Am……ow! What'd you do that for?"

"What'd I do _what _for?"

"THAT!"

"WHAT?!"

Aragorn sniggered and put on an Arwen-like voice. 

"Oh you horrible, horrible Elf, you're not worthy to be a Prince!"

"WHAT DID YOU JUST SAY?!!!!!"

And here again I am afraid I must censor some events for the benefit of our younger readers. You never know what Elrond's invented for their convenience and I'm sure computer hacking would have been considered very beneficial for 'sneaky studies.'

Well, there it is and I think I've gone to the point of no return when it comes to forced humour. 

But please read and review….pleeeeease?


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